Secrets
by swarkles-shipper
Summary: Marshall takes Marvin to visit his fathers grave for the first time (brief), Barney reveals a secret to Ted, Robin reveals one to Lily.
1. Chapter 1

It was the day before Superbowl Sunday. Vikings versus the Steelers. Upon hearing his favourite team was playing, Marshall decided to finally take his son to somewhere he'd wanted to take him for awhile; his father's grave. Lily worried about her husband when he told her this. He hadn't been to his father's grave in years and she feared it might bring up the emotions he'd been trying his best to shove away. Marvin was about 4 and him and his dad had the same relationship as Marshall did with his dad. Marvin idolized Marshall, although Marshall was completely unaware of this.

"Now, you're sure you don't want me to come with you guys?" Lily asked her husband as he finished packing.

"No, it's fine. It'll give me some father son bonding time." Marshall answered.

"I just want to make sure you're okay with going out there by yourself."

"I won't be by myself. And I'm okay Lil, really. It's been almost six years."

"But you and your dad were so close, I just don't want you to get upset around Marvin. You're his hero sweetie, if your heart breaks so does his."

"I'll be fine."

"You ready to go daddy?!" Marvin burst through the door and began jumping up and down on his parents bed. Marshall had to grab his shoulders to calm him down.

"Almost buddy! Why don't you do me a _big _favour and go make sure you have your jersey. Ok? Go!" Marvin left as quickly as he had came in. Lily gave her 'worried mom look' to Marshall. "We'll be fine."

"Okay." She said. Marshall grabbed his bag and carried it out to their living room, Marvin waiting anxiously on the couch, Vikings jersey in hand.

"You ready buddy?!" Marshall asked his son with a smile on his face.

"Yes!" Marvin screamed, jumped off the couch and ran out the door. "Bye mommy!"

"I'll call you when we get there." Marshall said, kissing Lily.

"I love you Marshmellow." She grinned.

"You too Lilypad" He said and left.

Ted had been quite busy himself, he and his wife had just welcomed their daughter, Leia, a few months prior. Ted's wife had already gone back to work, Ted being a volunteer stay-at-home dad. She had a conference out of town for the weekend, making Ted a little more nervous than usual. He decided to call in back up. Barney agreed to come over, Robin spending the weekend with Lily once Marshall and Marvin left for their trip.

Barney wasn't Ted's first choice. Maybe third or fourth. But with Marshall out of town, and being stuck at home all day with a screaming baby, Ted needed a bro. Someone who could help him cut loose.

"Ted Evelyn Mosby, this weekend is gonna be legen, wait for it…" Barney began.

"Dairy, got it. Yeah I can pick it up later. Love you too, bye." Ted hung up the phone to see Barney standing at his doorway, six pack of beer in either hand. "I'm sorry what were you saying?"

"Nothing. You want one?" Barney offered, Ted nodded and Barney handed him a beer then taking one himself. "So where is it?"

"Where's what?"

"You know the kid thing."

"My daughter? She's sleeping."

"It's so weird to hear you say that word. 'Daughter.' It doesn't sound right."

"Well, it feels right."

"Ugh, don't start lactating on me Mosby." Barney said and took a big sip of beer.

"I can't believe neither you or Robin want kids."

"Why?"

"It's just such an amazing thing. I mean, it's you and the person you love the most as one whole person. You get to see everything you love be passed onto them, watch them laugh at everything, which will honestly melt your heart. Even Barney Stinson can't think a baby's laugh is the cutest thing in the world."

"Well, I don't, Ted. Now drop it."

"I was just saying."

"This isn't your place to say anything!"

"Barney I didn't mean to piss you off. Is everything okay with Robin?"

"Everything's fine with Robin, it's me. Things at work have been so stressful and she's been so great through it all, I mean the woman does everything. But I feel like we need time away, like just us two together for a while, I can't remember the last time we even had a weekend together."

"Hey, look, if you wanna go spend time with your wife, I get it. You don't have to stay if you don't want to."

"Nah, she said she'd have a girl's night with Lily."

"What's been going on at work that's been keeping you so late?"

"Oh, you know."

"No, I don't Barney, we don't even know what your job is."

"Just a bunch of lawsuits and paperwork and illegal trade, the usual."

Ted looks at Barney, confused. What did he even do for a living? This thought was interrupted by Leia screaming. Ted gets up and heads towards his daughters room, Barney trailing behind. Ted walks over to Leia's crib and picks her up, slowly rocking her back and forth until she falls back asleep. Ted doesn't place her back in the crib, instead he continues looking at his daughter, unable to fathom just how much he loves her. Barney stares at them, letting his mind wander.

Lily sits on the couch, flipping through channels as she waits for Robin to come over with food and alcohol. She checks her phone constantly, waiting to hear from Marshall. She knew it'd still be awhile before they were in Minnesota but she was a mother, she worried. Robin bursts through the door, a bag of Chinese food in her hand. Lily gets up to help her.

"You forgot the drinks." Lily remarked.

"Oh, shit, sorry about that Lil, my mind is all over lately." Robin replied.

"Is everything okay?" Lily asked concerned for her friend.

"Yeah, everything's fine, just haven't had much time alone with barney lately if you know what I mean." Robin replied.

"Oh, you could've stayed at home with him, I wouldn't have minded."

"Ted asked him to help baby-sit Leia earlier, and it's fine, we haven't really hung out just the two of us for awhile."

"Yeah, we haven't, it's nice. If you want I think Marshall has a few beers in the fridge, I'm sure he wouldn't mind."

"Actually, I'm good for now, just wanna eat this Chinese food, smelled amazing the whole way over."

Marshall and Marvin were only a couple hours into their roadtrip, Marvin sat in the back playing some sort of gaming device, Marshall keeping his eyes on the road, occasionally staring back at his son. He thought about the trips he'd gone on with his dad when he was Marvin's age, all the great memories he had with his dad made him hope that someday his son would feel the same way about their memories. He still missed his dad, though over the years the pain had gotten more bearable he knew he'd never get over his father's death, he prayed Marvin wouldn't have to experience death the way he did, no warning, no time to prepare, then again, would that really have helped? He shook these ideas out of his mind quickly, not wanting to think about Marvin losing him.

"Barney? Barney?" Ted called, Barney lost in his own thoughts.

"Oh, what?" Barney said, coming back to reality.

"You okay, you kinda spaced out on me."

"Yeah, just thinking I guess."

"What about?" Ted asked, Barney stayed silent and looked away, not feeling like Ted really wanted to know what was bothering him but instead looking to see what he'd fucked up now. "Barney, I'm your best friend, you can tell me."

"Did you, I am, really?" Barney stuttered, in all the years he'd known Ted whenever Barney had even mentioned in the slightest that he, not Marshall, was Ted's best friend, Ted had never admitted it.

"Yeah, really." Ted confirmed, Barney sighed before he spoke.

"When you were with Robin, did it ever bother you that she didn't want kids?"

"Um, yeah, but that's because I always saw kids in my future, I felt like the whole time we were dating that was my blind spot, she'd told me from the start what she wanted and I feel like I just took in what I wanted to hear. Why?"

"Lately, I've been kinda, sorta, maybe thinking about the possibility of having a kid."

"Barney!" Ted screamed in shock.

"It's not like I want a dozen, just one, maybe."

"Have you talked to Robin at all, I feel like she'd be kind of important in the scenario."

"Well, no, but I don't even know if it is something I really want and I don't wanna stress her out or make her panic if I'm not even sure. Whenever the topic has come up before she'd acted weird and changed the subject as fast as she could."

"Do you think she's hiding something?"

"I wasn't sure at first but now I'm thinking there's something she's not telling me, I want to ask but I don't know how to bring it up without pissing her off or upsetting her. I don't know what to say anymore I feel like everything I say is wrong lately."

"I thought you said everything was okay with you two."

"It is but it isn't, like we're not getting into fights about anything I just feel like she's hiding something, there have been times where she'll go to tell me something then say it's nothing. I'm worried there's something wrong."

"You gotta be honest with her Barney, if she is keeping something from you there's probably a reason for it, but if it's bothering you like this you have to ask about it. I don't care if it's weird or awkward. It's weird and awkward seeing you like this."

Meanwhile, Lily and Robin were having a similar discussion.

"So, how's work?" Lily asked.

"Since when do you ask about my job?" Robin snapped. She wasn't trying to sound like a bitch it's just no one other than Barney actually cared about how work was going. "What do you really wanna know?"

"What up with you lately? Everything okay with Barney?"

"Yeah. I mean I guess. I don't know."

"Sweetie, you want to talk about it?" Lily asked concerned.

"Things at work haven't been great for him, he's been spending nights there and I'm not worried he's cheating or anything, I just feel like he's trying to get away from me and I'm scared that I'm right and I don't know what to do." Robin buried her face in her hands, trying to hide that fact she was crying.

"Robin, Barney loves you more than anything, why would you think something like that?"

"Because even when he's home it's weird between us. It feels like he's itching to say something and then chickens out at the last second, not that I'm any better."

"What have you been trying to tell him."

"He still doesn't know I can't have kids."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Thank you all so much for your reviews! Next chapter should be up soon, and Happy Birthday Gwyn! Hope you enjoy your birthday present! ;) **_

"Robin how could you not have told him something this big?" Lily asked in shock.

"I never really thought it was something we had to talk about since he never really wanted kids to begin with, plus, I was kind of scared." Robin replied.

"Why would you be scared? It's not like there's something you could've done to prevent it."

"I didn't want it to end our relationship like it did me and Kevin. That's why we broke up and I couldn't imagine myself without Barney."

"You and Barney are perfect together, kids or no kids, but he deserves to know. He isn't Kevin. Even if deep down Barney does want kids, he wants you more. This may not be a big factor in your future together and it probably won't even affect your relationship if he has the same view on kids as you do, but it is something your husband should know. Promise me you'll talk to him?"

"I will, eventually. It's not exactly something you just bring up over breakfast."

"But you will talk to him?"

"I will." Robin said, Lily turned her attention back to the tv, "Hey Lil?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

Lily's phone rang interrupting this sweet moment between the two of them. She leapt of the couch to grab her phone which she'd left in the kitchen. She looked at who was calling, it was Marshall.

"Hey sweetie." Lily answered

"Hey Lil, it's snowing pretty bad, we're still a few hours from St. Cloud so we're gonna spend the night at a motel, just thought I'd let you know, I know how much you worry." Marshall said. It was snowing pretty bad in New York too.

"Alright. How've things been so far?"

"Quiet. Weirdly quiet. I've been thinking a lot about my dad. It's harder than I thought." Marshall began to get choked up. He tried to hold back his tears.

"Are you going to be okay baby?"

"Yeah, yeah, just, it'll be hard you know? Dad would've really loved Marvin, I see so much of my dad in him Lil."

"Marshall, you don't have to do this. I know it's important to you but if you're not ready I don't think Marvin would be disappointed."

"I do have to do this Lily. I can't explain why but I feel like my dad would want me too, I want too."

"You sure you don't want me to come out there?" Lily asked nervously.

"No, babe, I gotta do this on my own. As much as I'd love you here, it has to be a father son thing." Marshall said firmly. "Hey, I gotta go get Marvin ready for bed."

"Okay, call me when you leave tomorrow?"

"Okay."

"Say goodnight to Marvin for me."

"I will."

"I love you Marshall."

"Love you too."

The next day, Robin tried to prepare herself as best she could to tell Barney. Barney doing the same. They'd never really talked about kids before, briefly, but not to any extent. Robin's views on kids were pretty clear but Barney's seemed to go back and forth, but were now set in one place.

After helping Ted the other day, there was no doubt in his mind he wanted a kid with Robin. Just one. One little person, half of him and half of the love of his life. Nothing seemed as perfect as this. He knew if they were to have a baby, it'd have Robin's eyes, he just knew. He imagined coming home to his little family, which brought a smile to his face every time.

Robin decided it'd be best to have the conversation after work, that way at least he'd be able to focus. She got home an hour or so before him. She had time to think over what she was going to say. She paced back and forth, nervous about what his reaction would be. Finally, he walked through the door.

"Barney, we need to talk." She said as soon as he shut the door behind him. She wanted to get this over with so she could stop shaking.

"Yes, we do." He replied.

He decided now was a good a time as any to talk about it. Robin looked at Barney, confused. What did he think they have to talk about? Did something happen at work? Was everything okay with Loretta? A million thoughts raced through her head.

"Yeah, uh, you wanna go first then?" Anything to prolong her from going.

"Robin, I want to have a baby." He didn't hesitate, "I know we've never talked about this and I know it's not something you really want but, I see Ted with Leia and the way he looks at her and I want that. And I want that with you. Baby, I love you so much, and no matter what you say I'll always feel that way about you. Do you want to have a baby?"

Robin stared at her husband in awe. Although she wouldn't dare admit it to anyone, not even Lily, she did want a baby. She knew adoption wouldn't be something her and Barney could go through without one of them backing out when things got too real. She felt like if it were to happen, she would have to be pregnant, which she knew was impossible.

Barney watched Robin look at him, her face looking like she'd just been told horrible news. He instantly regretted telling her. She began to cry, tears falling out of her eyes as though she were a faucet.

"Barney, I-" She began to say but broke down. She collapsed onto the chair and buried her face in her hands. He rushed over to her side, trying as best he could to hold her.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think it would bother you like this." He said.

"No, it's not that. I can't have kids Barney."

She looked up from her hands, her eyes bloodshot, her face stained with tears. He could see the pain in her eyes. She looked so fragile, not the tough Robin everyone in the group knew her as. He held her close to him, trying his best to hold back tears. She unravelled in his arms, gripping his suit, afraid if she let go he'd leave. He kissed her over and over, telling her it was okay and saying how much he loved her, his hands stroking her head. He pulled her away, staring at her face, which he still found remarkable beautiful. He pressed his forehead against hers and stared into her eyes.

"I love you so much." He said.

"I love you too." She sobbed.

He kissed her passionately, holding her face in his hands, her arms wrapped around his shoulders. What began as an innocent act of love soon transpired into something more. Their kiss grew deeper. He picked her up and carried her like he had on their honeymoon. He gently dropped her on the bed and made her forget why she had been crying.

She awoke in Barney's arms, making her feel more at home than she had in the past few months. She thought over what had happened last night. She still couldn't believe Barney wanted a baby. The worst part, him saying that only made her want one even more. She rolled over to watch her husband sleep, giving her some comfort. She suddenly ran out of the room and towards the bathroom. She began to vomit, making Barney wake up and come see if she was ok. He sat on the edge of the bathtub and rubbed her back.

"You okay?" He asked. She lifted her head, her face pale.

"Yeah. There's something going around at work, Patrice had the flu last week, I knew it was just a matter of time before I got it."

"Dammit Patrice!" He said, knowing how badly she wanted to say it. She managed a smile.

What seemed to be a case of the stomach flu, seemed to be something more. After a week she still hadn't felt any better. She was tired all the time, everything made her nauseous. Barney had taken the week off the look after her, but by Friday, he'd had enough of her saying 'I'm fine.'


	3. Chapter 3

"That's it, I'm scheduling an appointment for you right now." Barney said firmly.

"It's fine Barney. You're making to big a deal out of this." Robin replied weakly. She lay in their bed, so run down and tired she barely got that out.

"It's not fine Robin! I hate not being able to do anything when your like this. You're going to the doctors, even if I have to carry you myself." She smiled when he said this. He always got over protective which, on the outside she disliked, but it was actually so adorable to her. She went to get up from the bed, Barney running over to her side.

"I got it. I can still stand you know, I'm not that sick. I really just want to relax" Robin said.

"Please, get back into bed, just for ten more minutes, I swear."

"Barn-"

"Ten."

Robin reluctantly climbed back into bed. Barney left the room and came back ten minutes later. He led Robin towards their bathroom and opened the door. He'd drawn a bath for the two of them. He took her hand and led her to the bathtub and helped her out of her pyjamas she'd been living in for the past few days. He then did the same. He got into the bath first, Robin doing the same once he was seated. She leaned her body against his, resting her head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, taking in her scent. He couldn't even begin to explain how much he loved her., and being so close to each other was so intoxicatingly beautiful, he couldn't imagine any place he'd rather be.

She closed her eyes and rested. She never felt as peaceful as she did in his arms. He held her tightly, his head leaning against her. He stuck his one hand out of the tub and poured a bottle of ginger ale. As much as she wished it was champagne, she knew she wouldn't be able to stomach it. She took small sips and thought about how amazing even the simplest things can be when your with the person you love. it was the best feeling in the world. One she'd hid from her entire life, but was more than worth the wait. she couldn't imagine anything better than this.

Marshall and Marvin woke up early the next day. Very early. Marvin nodded off in the car, Marshall fought to keep his eyes open for the remainder of the trip. Once they were in St. Cloud, Marshall stopped by his mothers house to drop off their bags and have a quick snack. Within the hour they were back on the road, heading towards the cemetery where Marshall's father had been buried years before. As he parked the car, he opened the trunk to his moms truck and carried out the barbeque and apron his dad had always used. Marvin grabbed the little portable radio from the back and followed his father.

The snow had been on the ground for some time and there was quite a bit of it. Almost up to Marvin's waist. Marshall smiled as his son trudges behind him as best he could. The snow seemed to dip as they neared the tombstone, his brothers said they'd be stopping by before heading over to their moms themselves. Marshall placed the barbeque down and helped set up their 'arena' for the day. Marvin was eager to help, excited to be visiting his grandpa for the first time. Marvin talked to the tombstone as though it were his grandfather, he told him all about school and how he wanted to be a quarterback for the Viking's. This trip was harder than Marshall thought it would be.

Barney leaned against the counter in their kitchen, waiting for the kettle to boil. Robin lay on the couch, flipping through channels on the tv. Barney's phone began to ring. He answered it.

"Hello? Uh, sure, what time?" He checked his watch, "that's fine, ok, thanks again, bye."

He placed the phone back in his pocket and poured the boiling water into a cup. He carried the tea over to Robin and handed it to her, kissing her on the forehead then taking a seat at the other end of the couch, her feet now on top of him.

"That was the doctor's office, they said they had a cancellation and could fit you in today. They said to be there by five." Barney said.

Back in Minnesota, Marshall began to throw some patty's on the grill as the pregame coverage blasted on his portable radio. Marvin stood beside his dad, having the time of his life simply being there with him. Marshall let him help flip the burgers like his dad had. It gave Marshall some feeling of accomplishment, as though he and Marvin were beginning to be like Marshall and his father. Once the burgers were done and the game had started, Marshall and Marvin sat in their poorly constructed chairs and listened eagerly, Marshall only having to explain a few things to Marvin.

"Did you ever see the Viks play dad?" Marvin asked his dad.

"No, I'd watch the game with my dad back at grandma's house. It was better than seeing them play, I got to watch the game with my best friend." Marshall smiled.

"So do I!" Marvin said happily. Marshall grinned ear to ear. "I think I wanna do this next year too."

"Really? This isn't boring for you?"

"Nope! I like hanging out with you and Grandpa."

The doctors office was almost bear, most people watching the Superbowl. Robin rested her head on Barney's shoulder as they waited. She tried her best not to fall asleep. She wasn't feeling as nauseous as she had, mostly just light headed. They were called in fairly quickly but still had to wait awhile for the doctor. Robin sat on the examination table, Barney in the chair beside her.

"What seems to be the problem?" The doctor asked, slipping into the room. Barney explained what had been going on for the past week. "Okay, well, we can run some tests, make sure it's just the flu, I hear it's pretty nasty this season so it could very well just be that."

"How long will these tests take?" Barney asked.

"Not to long, we should have results by tomorrow at the latest, everything being so advanced nowadays." The doctor replied.

Barney was told to go back to the waiting room, Robin was taken down the hall to get her tests done. It didn't take to long before they were sent home.

"We'll call you as soon the results come in."

They walked out and hailed down a cab. The cab slowed outside of MacLaren's, Barney looked at Robin, confused.

"Relax, I'm just going to hangout with Lily, she misses Marshall and Marvin so I said I'd come over and help distract her for a few hours. It's basically babysitting." Robin said.

"Okay." Barney replied. Robin always came home in a good mood after spending time with Lily.

"I'll be home in like an hour. You wanna grab some dinner after?" Robin asked.

"Sure, sounds great." Barney smiled and kissed Robin before she got out of the cab.

"AND THE VIKINGS WIN THE SUPERBOWL!" The announcer screamed through the radio.

"Yes!" Marvin cheered.

"YEAH! GO VIKS!" Marshall shouted. He jumped off his chair, picked up his son and spun him around, cheering.

"I think Grandpa is good luck Daddy!" Marvin said with glee as his father placed him on the ground.

"Me too, son." Marshall smiled.

"So have things been any better since the two of you talked?" Lily asked Robin.

"Actually, they have. He took it really well." Robin replied.

"Well, what happened?"

"I said we needed to talk, he agreed, then I let him go first and he was saying how he wants to have a baby-"

"He said he wanted to have a baby? Aw, that's so sweet! Sorry, continue."

"I basically had a breakdown and told him I couldn't have kids."

"What did he say?"

"He just said he loves me."

"Look at you two, all grown up."

"Yeah it's nice. Which reminds me, we are going out for dinner tonight, so I should be going, but I'll call you tomorrow." Robin said and left.

Back at their apartment, Barney waited anxiously in living room chair. His foot tapped relentlessly, his hands sweating. Was what the doctor said really true? Robin was taking forever to come home, making him a nervous wreck. He fiddled with his wedding ring, staring at the door, until finally, the knob turned. He jumped up and stood straight.

"Is everything okay?" Robin asked, she sensed something had happened.

"The doctor called." He said, his face expressionless.

"Already? That was quick. What did they say? Is everything okay?"

"Robin, you're pregnant."


	4. Chapter 4

_**Sorry I took so long to update. Next chapter will be better, I swear, this is just a quick one to set up a storyline. Hope you like it!**_

_**Robin stood there unable to move, Barney's words echoing in her head over and over. He head began to spin, her heart racing, her palms sweating. She took off her coat and placed it on a hook, remaining silent, She slowly began walking over to Barney's, whose face remained expressionless, waiting for her reaction she supposed.**_

"_**You're sure?" She mumbled.**_

"_**I'm sure." He confirmed.**_

"_**We're going to have a baby?" She smiled.**_

"_**We're going to have a baby." He smiled back**_

_**Robin ran into his arms, her legs wrapping around his waist, her arms linking around his neck. She buried her face in them, smiling beyond belief. He held her tightly his head nuzzled in her neck. She pulled her face out of her arms and stared into his eyes, both of them were crying by now. She smiled at him and kissed him. She slowly unwrapped her legs so her feet were back on the ground, although her head was in the clouds.**_

_**The next day, Ted decided to visit Lily for the day, they hadn't talked for awhile and Marshall decided to stay in Minnesota for another day or so. She lay on the couch, a bottle of wine in hand, tv remote in the other. She was watching some soap opera and crying. Ted walked in with Leia strapped to his chest.**_

"_**Hey Lil." He said cheerfully.**_

"_**How can you be so happy? Sam just killed Sarah, there is nothing to be happy about." Lily cried.**_

"_**And that's enough tv for one day, plus from what I've seen, Sarah was a total bitch, had it coming," Ted grabbed the remote out of Lily's hand and turned it off. He took a seat in the chair, seating Leia on his lap. "How're you doing being away from Marvin this long?"**_

"_**I'm coping." She replied and took a big swig of wine. "How're you doing without the wife?"**_

"_**We're doing just fine aren't we?" Ted said talking in the weird voice he used around his daughter. "How was your girls night with Robin?"**_

"_**It was alright, she seemed kind of off, saying Barney was working late and what not. Did he say anything to you?"**_

"_**Actually, he was acting weird to. He said he was working late doing, well, whatever Barney does for a living, and then he talked about maybe wanting kids-"**_

"_**Woah, woah, he said WHAT?!" **_

"_**He said he was thinking about having a kid with Robin? Why is that so terrible?"**_

"_**You dated Robin, you know her feelings on kids," Lily lied, she wasn't sure if Robin wanted her to tell Ted and when it was a secret like this, she didn't often spill the beans. Unless necessary of course. Ted's phone began going off.**_

"_**Hello? Um, sure, give me twenty minutes." Ted hung up and looked over at Lily, "I'm sorry, that was Barney, he said he needs to talk to me. Now. Sounded kinda serious. I'll see you when Marshall gets back."**_

_**Within seconds of Ted leaving, Lily's phone vibrated with a text from Robin asking if they could talk. What the hell could Robin and Barney have to talk about?**_

"_**Okay, so you tell to Ted and I'll talk to Lily." Robin said.**_

"_**Why don't we tell them together?" Barney suggested.**_

"_**Because I cannot physically handle to two of them smothering me at the same time. I love them both, they're my family but I think they would actually suffocate me." **_

"_**Alright. Love you." Barney said as she walked out the door.**_

"_**Love you too."**_

_**Robin soon arrived at Lily's, more nervous than she thought she'd be. She was happy, so unbelievable nervous and scared, but happy. Her and Barney were going to have a baby together, something she didn't know she wanted until now. She walked into Lily's apartment to find her painting, something Lily rarely did. Lily dropped the paintbrush as Robin walked in.**_

"_**Sweetie is everything okay?" Lily rushed over to her best friend.**_

"_**Yeah, everything's fine, really good actually." Robin smiled.**_

"_**Then what do you have to talk about?"**_

"_**You have to promise me you won't freak out, okay?"**_

"_**Fine, I promise, I don't know what you could possibly say that would make me freak out."**_

"_**I'm pregnant."**_

"_**Woooooooo!" Lily hugged Robin tightly. "Oh my god, I'm so happy for you, this is going to be so much fun, I can help you, we can go shopping for clothes together, I'm so excited!"**_

"_**Calm down!" Robin tried to breathe through Lily's death grip of a hug.**_

"_**I'm sorry, I'm just so excited. But wait, I thought you couldn't have kids."**_

"_**So did I, but apparently I can. I phoned the doctor and she said there may have been a mix up in some of the paperwork but she'll have me come in and run some tests to make sure everything's going okay."**_

"_**How's Barney doing with all of this?"**_

"_**He's really happy, we both are."**_

"_**You're not freaking out?"**_

"_**Nope. Well, maybe a little, but that's allowed right? I mean the whole mom thing isn't exactly something I was prepared to do and I don't wanna mess the kid up. Plus I know my career is going to basically fly out the window so now as I'm saying everything out loud it's becoming more real and I'm realizing I can't do this, I'M FREAKING OUT!"**_

_**Barney anxiously waited for Ted at his apartment. He jumped as Ted walked through the door.**_

"_**What is so urgent I had to come over right away?" Ted sighed.**_

"_**Robin's pregnant." Barney said.**_

"_**Robin's-"**_

"_**Pregnant, yes. With my baby, and at first I thought it's what I wanted, I still do, but I'm, I'm scared Ted. What if this kid hates me?" Barney collapsed onto the couch.**_

"_**Your kid is not going to hate you. Listen, Barney, everyone feels this way when they first find out their having a baby, but the truth is, you're going to be an amazing dad, and Robin an amazing mom."**_

"_**Did you freak out when you found out?"**_

"_**Freak out?! I took a train to Jersey! I was a mess! It takes a while to get used to the idea of a human life depending on you, but it's also kind of amazing. I mean I know it's scary but in the end it's definitely worth it."**_

"_**What if I'm not ready. When we looked after Hurri-, Sadie, we fed her root beer. I don't know the first thing about parenting."**_

"_**Why don't you look after Leia for the day?" Ted suggested.**_

"_**Really?"**_

"_**Yeah, I got a few things to do tomorrow, why don't you and Robin baby sit and, I don't know, begin your training."**_

"_**You make it sound like boot camp."**_

"_**It's nothing like boot camp, because in boot camp, you sleep."**_

"_**So how long are you going to be gone?"**_

"_**Barney! Come on, you can do this! I'll come by around noon and pick her up around eight. I trust you and Robin enough, I won't even give you a list. It's really more of a schedule."**_

"_**Thanks, bro."**_


	5. Chapter 5

It was a nice Monday morning. Barney had been up for an hour or so now, wondering what to do until Ted arrived with Leia. He was a little bit worried. He and Robin never really babysat a baby before. Not even Marvin when he was that small. Ted always took care of it.

Over the past few days Robin had been thinking. _A lot. _She was going to have a baby. She always thought babies were scary and the fact that one had been growing inside of her for the past little while didn't make it any less scary. She rolled over in her and Barney's bed, his side empty. She slowly got out of bed and trudged towards the kitchen_._

On the counter sat a plate of pancakes and maple syrup, still hot. Barney sat on the couch rereading the paper for the umpteenth time, pretending it interested him. As Robin sat down and began to eat, there was a knock on the door. Barney jumped off the couch to answer it, Robin didn't seem to notice.

"Here's her schedule, don't do anything that is not on this schedule Barney, I mean it. I'll be back by eight, she hasn't had lunch yet but I fed her not to long ago so she should be okay for another hour or so. Please remember to feed her." Ted continued to ramble for several minutes about his daily routine with his daughter, leaving, only after saying goodbye for the fifth time.

"What does a baby even do for eight hours besides eating and sleeping.?" Barney asked, carrying Leia to the couch, placing her on his lap as he sat.

"You make her sound like a cat." Robin replied from the table.

"We should've gotten a cat."

"Little late for that, don't you think.?"

The first few hours went by surprisingly fast. The two of them had begun to get into more of a parental mind. Barney loved watching Robin as she rocked Leia back and forth and Robin loved watching Barney make Leia laugh. By five or so, the schedule instructed that Leia be woken up.

"I don't want to wake her up she looks so peaceful." Robin leaned over the playpen where Leia was fast asleep.

"Ted said we have to follow the schedule and if she doesn't sleep tonight he'll kill us. The look in his eye made me think he wasn't kidding."

"She's just so cute, I mean what other baby could be this cute?"

Barney stood closely behind his wife and wrapped his arms around her, his chin resting on her shoulder.

"Ours." He whispered. She chuckled and turned to face him, her arms now around his neck.

"How do you know our baby will be that cute?"

"Robin, look at the parents. This kid is a genetic goldmine."

"You're an idiot." Robin smiled and gently kissed his lips.

Leia began to stir, making Robin quickly turn back around and pick her up. As she did Leia began to cry, Robin tried her best to soothe her. Barney tried to help as well, not quite sure what to do, then again, neither of them were.

After an hour or more of Leia crying, Barney and Robin had no idea what to try next, Ted wasn't answering his cell and they'd run out of options.

"Please, Robin, there has to be something we haven't done yet." Barney pleaded, his ears ready to bleed.

"I've tried everything Barney," Robin replied, exhausted. "It won't stop."

"Give her a fucking drink just make her stop!"

"Calm down, if we yell she'll only cry more."

"I don't really see how that's possible. Here let me try."

"Fine, see if you can find the off switch." Robin handed Leia over to Barney, the crying continued.

"Take her back." Barney said, not even five minutes after holding her.

"No, I did this for an hour, your turn."

"We're supposed to be doing this together!"

"Then why was I the only one doing anything?"

"You didn't ask me to do anything!"

"You couldn't offer? Do I have to give you a fucking list?"

"I can't do this right now." Barney handed Leia over to Robin, grabbed his jacket and stormed out the door. Robin collapsed onto the couch, still trying to make Leia stop crying, although Robin soon began to cry herself.

Barney headed downstairs and hailed a cab. As he got in and gave the driver directions, he pulled out his phone.

"Lily? It's Barney. I don't know if now's a good time but I need to talk to someone. Thanks."

Lily sat and waited for Barney in her living room, wasn't today when he and Robin were babysitting? He burst through the door in a panic, he was a mess.

"Barney?! What happened?" LIly asked nervously. He wasn't drunk or beaten, he just looked scared and worried.

"We were babysitting for Ted and everything was going fine and then she wouldn't stop crying, Robin and I tried everything but _nothing was working and we got into this stupid fight and I stormed out. Why did I do that?" Barney explained._

"_Your scared. It's not an uncommon thing but babysitting Leia with Robin made everything seem more real to the two of you. I'm sure Robin's feeling the same way, only she's the one that's pregnant imagine how she's feeling right now."_

"_I feel like an ass, but I'm really scared Lily, I can't be a dad, I don't know how to do any of that, I never had anyone show me what being a dad really was."_

"_Neither did Marshall, and neither did Ted. At least you two get some practise before your baby's born, we had to learn on the job. I'm not gonna lie and say it's easy and everyone can do it, because that's actually te biggest lie everyone will tell you, instead I'll tell you the truth; it's so hard to be a parent, but as hard as it may be sometimes, there is nothing as beautiful as your child's first. Wait until the first time you hold them, their first smile, the first laugh, the first word. It makes it all worth while."_

"_Even when you put it like that it stills scares me, but in more of a good way I guess. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm excited for this too, it's just been crazy lately and at work everything is insane there too."_

"_You have to sort your priorities out Barney. I'm sure if you explained everything at work they could find someone else to do, well, whatever you do. You can't be the only one of those at your office."_

"_I will. Thanks Lily." Barney said sincerely. _

"_Now, please, go sort this out with Robin." Lily pleaded._

"_Usually when we fight I bring her some scotch."_

"_Well you're going to have to think of something else for the next few months. Now go!"_


	6. Chapter 6

_**SO sorry I took so long, I rewrote the ending I don't know how many times, still not that happy with it but I'd rather not wait another week for a sentence or two. Hopefully it won't take as long to update the new chapter. Anyways, enjoy! **_

Robin sat on the couch, holding Leia, tears silently escaping her eyes. Soon after Barney left, Leia had stopped crying. Robin glanced at the time over and over, waiting for Ted to come and pick up his daughter, she needed to be able to relax. She jumped off the couch to answer the door, Ted standing there anxiously waiting to hold his daughter.

"Thanks so much for doing this Robin. Where's Barney?" Ted asked, taking Leia out of Robin's arms.

"He, uh, had to pick some stuff up. He left not to long ago but I'm not sure when he'll be back." She knew these were all pointless details but she couldn't stop rambling. She didn't want to tell Ted what had happened, knowing him he'd make her and Barney talk it out or try to fix it himself.

"Oh, okay. Thank him for me, I know what a handful she can be, I really appreciate it. And hey, pretty son I'll be able to return the favour." Ted said with a smile and left.

Robin glanced longingly over at the bottle of scotch that sat on the counter. All she wanted was a drink but she knew one drink would quickly turn into five. She instead lay on the couch, not quite sure what to mind began to wonder, an array of thoughts coursing through her mind. Was this all a mistake? Were they ready to be parents? She felt maybe the two of them were caught up in the moment and now that reality had set in Barney was ready to bail. She clenched her stomach at the thought of Barney wanting to bail.

Barney sat in a cab which seemed to be moving slower than it was. He felt like an ass, he hated how he'd reacted. The last thing he should've done was leave. They were going to be parents, he needed to learn how to deal with situations like this without leaving. He knew them not fighting after the baby was born wasn't completely avoidable, but he also knew Robin wouldn't be as full of hormones.

He stood in front of the door to their apartment, he hesitated and prepared himself for the worst. He opened the door quickly, waiting for Robin to begin yelling at him, instead, he found her asleep on the couch. He smiled, she looked so at peace. He walked over to her, scooping her up in his arms. He carried her into their room and gently placed her into their bed.

He grabbed a pillow from his side of the bed and a blanket from the linen closet and lay them out on the couch. This was their routine when they fought he was to sleep on the couch. Although they rarely fought, he knew the routine well.

She awoke to an empty bed, although they were in a fight she missed him by her side, waking up to his warmth and their bodies intertwined. She slowly got out of bed and walked into the kitchen. She saw Barney, still asleep on the couch. It was her day to make breakfast, the two of them had decided on this long ago and no fight could break this tradition.

Barney woke up to the sound of bacon being fried. He sat up and looked over at the kitchen. Robin stood her face unreadable, even to him. She felt his eyes on her and glanced over, offering a small smile

"Morning." She said, not bitterly however the usual sweetness in her voice was missing.

"Morning." He mumbled. "Can we talk, about yesterday?"

"Whats there to say?"

"I handled that situation all wrong and I'm sorry. I swear to you I will do anything to make it up to you."

"I don't want you to make it up to me Barney! You walked out when the situation got to much to handle." Robin yelled.

"I know I did and I'm sorry, I am so sorry I left okay but I went over and talked to Lily and I told her, I told her how scared I was." Barney said calmly.

"I know you're scared Barney, but I am terrified. You can choose to leave at any time and be done with me and the baby but I don't have that option."

"You think I would leave you?"

"I never used to, but, after yesterday it seemed to easy for you to just walk out."

"I came back though didn't I?! I thought you knew me better than this Robin, you of all people know I will _always _come back."

"How do I know that?"

"Because I love you! Has that not been clear all the time we've been together?"

"It has, and I know you do, and I love you too but I don't want our relationship to be us screaming at each other about everything."

"It won't be. Look, can we talk about this later, I have to get to work."

"Yeah, sure." Robin sighed.

"Now, I have to leave in order to get to work, is that okay?" Barney said sounding like a douche. He left, slamming the door behind him.

He didn't have a meeting, he just had to leave, again, and knew she'd be even more upset if he just stormed out. He wasn't quite sure where to go. He didn't want to risk going to MacLaren's, he knew if any of his friends saw him it'd get out to Robin. He decided to go to a hotel a few blocks away. His day consisted of emptying as many alcoholic beverages as he could and passing out on the bed. He called Robin around nine to say he wouldn't be home, he had some work to take care of.

She knew he wasn't at work, his speech was slurred and he had trouble putting words together. She went along with his lie, figuring he shouldn't come home drunk because who knows what they'd end up saying to each other. She had a horrible time sleeping that night however.

Maybe it was the fact they'd never had a fight where he couldn't come home. She felt uneasy being alone in the apartment without Barney. He always came home no matter what time it was. He would slide into their bed and wrap his arms around her and she would finally be able to sleep.

Or maybe it was the fact she had her first doctor's appointment tomorrow and she wasn't even sure if Barney was coming. She rolled over in their bed and checked the time. She contemplated on whether or not she should text him and remind him, but ultimately decided not to.

Barney's head pounded. He slowly opened his eyes and tried to remember where he was. He reached his hand out to his coat pocket and searched for some aspirin. After the pain began to subside, he checked his phone, no messages. He did a double take at the time and jumped off the bed. He didn't care whether they were fighting or not, he was going to this appointment.

Robin sat in the waiting room, alone. She checked her phone over and over to check the time and to see if Barney had text her or left a message. She figured he'd just forgotten or was nursing his hangover. She was more upset about it than she'd like to admit. This was her first appointment and she was beyond nervous considering she'd been told years earlier she couldn't have kids. She figured Barney of all people would understand her nerves.

"Sorry I'm late." Robin looked up to see Barney standing in front of her.

"You came!" She smiled.

"Of course. I wouldn't miss this, no matter how bad the hangover." He took the seat beside her, neither of them knowing what to say.

"Robin Stinson?" the doctor called. Without thinking, Robin grabbed Barney's hand, he gave it a gentle squeeze and followed her into the room.

Robin lay on the table, still gripping Barney's hand. He couldn't tell if this was a sign of her forgiveness or if she was just nervous. They waited for the doctor in silence. He so badly wanted to ask if she forgave him, but he didn't want to get into that again, not here anyways.

The doctor walked in and greeted them both. She asked Robin several questions and then proceeded onto the sonogram. Robin was about 10 weeks along so the baby was fairly easy to find. They stared at it in awe. Barney rested his head against Robin which she slightly leaned into. He resisted the urge to kiss her which was the easily the most difficult thing he'd ever have to do.

"What's that sound?" Barney asked.

"That's your baby's heartbeat." The doctor smiled. "I'll give you two a minute."


	7. Chapter 7

**I am so sorry for taking so much longer to update, my grandma's been kinda sick lately so I've been helping out among other family things, I won't bore you all, thanks for being so patient with me. I will continue to update I just can't promise how quickly but I know what I'm doing for the next few chapters so _hopefully _soon. Until then, enjoy!**

It was a moment of bliss between the two of them. It made the thoughts of anger evaporate until they were completely obsolete. They stared at the screen, hands intertwined, heads resting against each other. Tears of joy silently fell out of both their eyes, Barney wiping Robin's, as well as his own, away. She smiled.

She knew they couldn't just forget what had happened before, he knew it too. They'd have to talk about it eventually, but this was neither the time nor the place to bring up their marital status.

The doctor soon returned to the room and finished up the appointment and offered them a disc of the sonogram, which Robin eagerly grabbed.

After the appointment was done, the parted ways, each off to work since neither had attended the day before. Barney gripped her hand, still, not wanting to let her go and get into the cab. Her hand cupped the one side of his face and she leaned in and gently kissed him. As she pulled away, they smiled at each other, Barney's forehead slowly meeting hers. She began to walk towards the cab, him reluctantly letting her go.

Marshall burst through the door, Marvin running straight towards his room as he did. Lily walked out of the kitchen and embraced her husband. Marshall squeezed her tightly, not realizing just how much he missed her. Even now they were rarely apart, which most people found odd, but it's how they'd always been. As long as they were with each other, they felt at home.

"How was your time alone?" Marshall asked slowly pulling away, his arms still around Lily.

"It was okay, I really missed you guys though."

"I hope nothing too exciting happened while I was gone."

"Oh yeah you still don't know!"

"Still don't know what?"

"Barney and Robin are having a baby." Lily told him.

"What?! Geeze woman you couldn't have told me over the phone?!"

"I wanted to see your reaction."

"Oh, well, good for them." Marshall goes into the kitchen and grabs a beer, then comes back into the living room and sits down, "we should have another one."

"Another what? Baby?"

"Yeah, Marvin would make a good older brother don't you think?" Lily paused.

Although the topic of kids wasn't one her and Marshall had avoided, it was just never one that was touched on that often. Lily loved Marvin but wasn't sure she wanted another kid, and she didn't think Marshall did either. The way his face lit up when he brought the idea up made crushing it so quickly seem a little harsh.

"Yeah he would. D-do you want another baby?"

"I mean I've definitely thought about it, and I would love for Marvin to experience what it's like to have a sibling. Hell, I had two and even though we fought, I loved having brothers."

"Well, I grew up an only child and I loved that. It wasn't the best childhood but I think it was better than it would've been with a sibling."

"Lily, do you not want another baby?"

Barney was already home by the time Robin got there. She always worked later than him and would usually come home to dinner already made. Although she probably wouldn't admit it, Barney himself probably wouldn't either, but he was one of the best cooks she had ever met. Today was different however. When she walked through the door he wasn't cooking, he hadn't even started. She tried not to look disappointed but it was a regular thing between the two of them. Instead he sat nervously on the couch, waiting for her to come home. He wanted to talk about what ad happened before, get everything out now instead of an awkward meal where all you could hear was the utensils against the plates.

"We need to talk about before." He spoke. "I need to apologize for leaving, I know it was wrong to just walk out and I'm sorry. I don't know what I can do to make you forgive me or make you think I won't leave you. Robin, I could never leave you."

"I know, and I'm sorry too, I knew it was hard looking after Leia, it just scared me seeing you act that way, I've never seen you so angry. I know you would never leave me but these damn hormones have been making me think weird thoughts and say weird things and I'm not trying to use them to justify how I acted towards you but it's the truth."

"Robin, you shouldn't be apologizing for being pregnant. I should've been more understanding to how it was making you feel. I shouldn't be causing you any stress, if anything I should help you relieve some of it." Barney stands up and walks over to Robin, embracing her tightly.

"I love you." She murmured into his shoulder.

"I love you too." He replied, slowly pulling away and reaching into his pocket. "Hey, I got you something. You know how usually when we fight I get you scotch?"

"Yeah, but I can't have any now."

"I know that, that's why I got you." He pulled out a small roll of tape, "scotch tape."

"You're an idiot." She smiled and embraced him once again.

"You know what we should do tomorrow?"

"What?"

"We should go to We B Babies together."

"That actually sounds like a lot of fun!"

"It's a date!" He smiled


	8. Chapter 8

_**I hope I wasn't too late with this one, wasn't really sure how to end it, but I think it turned out okay **__**J. The next chapter will be set about a month after all of this, until then, enjoy!**_

"Lil?" Marshall spoke. Lily hadn't answered him, making him nervous. "Do you not want another baby?"

"I don't know. Marshall, I know you always wanted a big family, and I thought that's what I wanted to, but I think we were fantasizing instead of seeing the reality. Do you remember when Marvin was first born? How rough those first few months were, how rough that first year was? I'm not saying no, it's just I'm not sure I want to go through that again." Lily said.

"But baby, yes, it was hard, I won't lie there were some days where I wanted to leave and come back in a day or two. Sometimes not at all. Do you remember all the firsts that made those nights with no sleep totally and completely worth it? I'm not saying we have to have another baby right this minute, I'm just asking you to think about it."

"Okay, I will, I just need sometime."

"Yeah, baby, take all the time you need."

"I want you to think about it to. This might just be a spur of the moment kind of thing and I don't want to say yes only to have you say no. Does that make any sense?"

"Don't you think we should talk about it together though? It is a decision both of us have to make so it seems stupid to think about it separately." Marshall responded.

"I guess you're right." Lily agreed.

"So, let's talk."

"Robin, the store opens in an hour!" Barney called from the living room. Robin was still getting ready.

"You know, even if we don't get there as soon as it opens, they will let us in." Robin teased from the bedroom.

Barney was excited and anxious to get to the store. Last time they'd been there hadn't been the happiest of times so it was nice to overwrite those memories with newer and happier ones. He wasn't even all the sure what they were going for. Some furniture, obviously, but what could they really get? They didn't know the sex of the baby, and he and Robin had, had so much else going on they hadn't talked about whether they wanted to know or not. Barney wanted to know though. He _really _wanted to know.

Robin never took this long to get ready but it was although she had ballooned overnight. She wasn't more than 3 months along, so her stomach wasn't all that big, but big enough that none of her pants would zip up. After trying on the tenth pair (at the least), she gave up and put on some sweatpants and a baggy sweater and walked out into the living room.

"Woah, don't show to much skin now." Barney joked.

"Nothing fits." She sighed and fell into his arms. He chuckled and hugged her back.

"Does this mean we have to go clothes shopping too?" He asked, she nodded. "Fine, let's go."

"Well, I know it sounds selfish, but try and remember what I went through last time. Pregnancy isn't the most fun thing to go through." Lily stated.

"I know but baby, remember the first time you held Marvin, don't you want that same feeling again?" Marshall said.

"I might. I don't know. I'm finally doing a job I love and having a baby would just back-peddle everything. That's over a year of my life Marshall."

"I don't want to convince you to have another baby, Lil. I feel like it's your decision if you want another baby, my mind has been set for awhile. I'm not trying to pressure you, I'll love you no matter what you say, but you have to decide this on your own."

"Daddy! Come play!" Marvin called from his room, letting Marshall leave Lily alone to her thoughts.

They were overwhelmed as they stepped into We B Babies. That last time they'd been here together wasn't exactly the greatest time for either of them. Now, they were their together, to shop for _their baby. They just started but walking around, looking for basic furniture, just to make the reality set in. Robin was more drawn to the clothes than anything, looking at the same Canadian onesie that made her burst into ears the last time._

"_Really Robin?" Barney asked._

"_You do realize this baby is more Canadian than American, all thanks to your grandmother." Robin smiled and placed the onesie in their basket. She continued walking, Barney following her, letting her have her fun. _

_Her face lit up as they walked by the tiny dresses. His did too. He didn't care what they had, it would be the most awesome kid no matter what. Robin's hand glided through the material, longing to grab one and throw it in with the onesie._

"_Go ahead." Barney urged._

"_We don't know if it's a girl or a boy though." She replied._

"_So? Robin, if you like it, buy it. If this one's a boy the next one will be a girl." _

"_The next one?! I'm doing this one time and one time only, you better enjoy every moment of it!"_

"_Aha, don't worry, I am." He smiled and gently kissed her, sneaking the dress Robin had her eye on into their basket. "Are we going to get anything besides clothes while we're here."_

"_Yeah, we can get one of those, the baby-cage things." Robin pointed across the store._

"_You mean the crib?"_

"_Whatever they're called. Do you wanna go get one?" Robin asked excitedly. Barney nodded and she sped over, dragging him along._

_It took them over an hour to decide on a crib. Robin was so indecisive and Barney decided to let her have this one. He was surprisingly relaxed about it all and decided whatever would keep Robin relaxed he was cool with. Of course, he didn't have the most fun carrying what he assumed was the biggest crib in the store out to the cab. Robin insisted he set up the crib as soon as they were home._

_She sat and watched him, not daring to try and help, Barney was starting to get aggravated which she found to be oddly sexy. Eventually he finished, stood up and took pride in his work. Robin inspected his work, giving him a nod of approval. She stood in front of him and his arm slowly snaked around her swelling stomach. He rested his chin on her shoulder. Tears were forming. She wasn't sure if it was her hormones acting up again, but it made her feel so at peace. Seeing the crib made Robin realize that this was it. They were having a baby. _


End file.
